Robots and volcano burritos

Okay this morning after waking up from a epic dream of fighting alien robots dropping upon the masses like bombs from these massive star ships. Lucky for us as advanced as the alien race that waged war on the humans might be, their robot warriors weren't all to bright. And as far their laser weapons it would catch your clothes on fire and give you flesh a nice branding. The laser needed to be fix on a certain area for a long time to do any fatal damage. However their mechanical bodies were pretty frail and light so I could pick them up a body slam them hard enough to destroy them. But did I mention that there were thousands of them that dropped in from the skies? But anyways. I laid there in bed one eye awake and one eye asleep and cranky as my Jen ALWAYS feels the need to tell me every morning. I roll out of bed and put on some clothes, well a shirt and a pair of pants. My feet I left bare because I had to go down stairs and fetch me a pair of socks. But before I was going to do that I stumble into the bathroom and start my ritual of deodorant and oral care. Check, Check, and Check. Well my bride tells me that there is a burrito for each of us in the kitchen she had prepared. Yummy I thought. And what a lucky guy I am. Well I walked into the kitchen and there on the counter sat this long tightly wrap bean and cheese burrito toasted with a whole wheat tortilla surrounding the hot contents..... And next to it was a bottle of Frank's hot sauce..... So on comes the hot sauce shower. I opened my mouth to take a hardy bite and as my teeth sank into the burrito a weak spot in the whole wheat tortilla gave way to the built in pressure and blew a hole in the sidewall about midway... The split spewed molten cheese and re fried bean like a stream of hot lava from a volcano. Well as gravity worked its way on the molten mess my bare foot just so happened to be right under its path. So splat! Right on the little piggy that stayed home... Now I felt the burrito's insides hit my foot and felt the slight sensation of the burrito burning my mouth as I bit. Was thinking "Wow this is pretty hot. I better be careful." But then it hit me... The pain of searing heat rose from my foot to my brain.... My eyes open wide... I start shaking my foot. But as you can imagine the lava mess stuck like glue.... I couldn't help it... With my mouth full I let out a scream... YYYYEEEEEOOOOOWWWWWWWW!!!!!!!!! I quickly took my hand and started wiping the beans off my toe.... burning my hand too but my hands are slightly more use to dealing with heat.... I start dancing, soaking in all the pain so I wouldn't start crying like a baby......... Only to explain my story to Jen and Nevaeh and get ridiculed from their laughter... But I got the "Oh honey I'm sorry... It's not funny. But it's so funny." I guess she was talking about my scream....